The Sin That So Easily Besets
One of the arguments I have heard regarding the normalcy of homosexuality from both the more general public to Christians to atheists and everyone in between is that “they” were born this way and didn’t have a choice.
My initial response to that was negative, given that God calls homosexuality sin, why would someone be born that way. Certainly, God wouldn’t create a being with a desire that is contrary to his ordered way. Yet, many say they have been same-sex attracted for as long as they can remember.
The argument from the “other side” is mostly that it is environmental. Exposure at a young age to homosexually erotic material, sexual abuse, peer pressure, are said to be the contributing factors to a person falling into the practice of homosexuality. I believe that this is the foundational attitude that led to the practice of Conversion Therapy. I’m not looking to defend or condemn that practice here.
Sad to say for many years I didn’t do what the name of my blogsite suggests, pause to think. When I finally did, a couple things happened. First of all, I normalized the sin of homosexuality. That is not to say that I no longer saw homosexuality to be sin, the Scripture is clear about that, rather I stopped seeing it emotionally as one of the most heinous of sins. I found this helpful. For a 100% heterosexual man, homosexuality (on a strictly emotion level, viewed through gallons of testosterone) is a gross sin. By gross, I don’t mean large, I mean, disgusting. I had to deal with that first.
Whenever we see another person’s sin this way, we give pride an opening. Ironically, one could make the argument that pride IS the greater sin. Certainly, the Bible speaks of it far more than it does homosexuality. But we also know that quantity is not necessarily a gage of seriousness, one way or another. Again, that is not the point of this piece.
First of all, we need to clarify that being tempted to commit homosexual acts (or any act that the Bible calls sin), is not sin. If temptation alone were sin, then the One who went to the cross did so illegitimately, and the salvation the Christian hangs his hat on is also illegitimate, Christ was not the spotless lamb, for Christ was tempted “IN ALL THINGS” as we are. Hebrews 4:18 makes the case that temptation is not sin. “For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things just as we are, yet without sin.”
I can remember as a much younger person, even in single digits, the attitude that if you were tempted with sinful desires or thoughts, that something was wrong with you. There was, and to some degree still is, a culture of shame prevalent not only in society, but also (shamefully) in the church. Yet we know, also from Scripture, that sin is our nature. We don’t always struggle with the same sin(s) as everyone else, yet, according to Romans 3:23, “for all have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God”. In this one statement Paul equalizes all of humanity and destroys any reason for pride. Of course, given the statement itself, truth doesn’t necessarily prevent us from being prideful.
So, if all have sinned, if I have sinned, what is the difference between me and the one who practices homosexuality. That is simply the particular sin. Because of this fact, we actually compound our own sin by looking down on those that are found in the LGBTQ community. Again, pride is (one of) our sins.
The title of this piece is The Sin That So Easily Besets. Let’s finally get to that.
Again, in this process of considering the “comes natural” argument for the legitimacy of practicing homosexuality, I recalled the verse in Hebrews 12. Which says; “Therefore, since we also have such a great cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let’s rid ourselves of every obstacle and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let’s run with endurance the race that is set before us.” It was the phrase, “the sin which so easily entangles us” that leapt out at me. The King James uses the word “besets” instead of “entangles”. Both work but, “besets” is a much stronger word by definition (to attack on all sides; assail; harass) than does “entangles” (ensnarl, intertwine, to confuse or perplex). Certainly, “besets” defines more accurately the attacks that we all experience from time to time, (some more frequently than others), from the one who IS our enemy, Satan. 1 Pete 5:8 says; “Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” The sin that so easily besets us is an aggression by the devil “seeking someone to devour”.
Back to the process. That verse in Hebrews is written to all of us, not just homosexuals. So, the logical question we should ask ourselves, rather than looking on others and the struggles they have, saying pridefully, “I don’t struggle with THAT” is, what is the sin that so easily besets me?
To personalize, I struggle with “opposite-sex attraction”. One might ask why I would call “opposite-sex attraction” a struggle, given that the Bible teaches that that IS the natural order God gave humans. That is a great question and goes to the heart of the matter.
While I have been married for 44 years, I have always found some women, who are not my wife, attractive. This didn’t begin later in our marriage; this was true from the beginning. It wasn’t because I suddenly found her unattractive or unappealing or we weren’t getting along. It was my natural state. As I said earlier, temptation (attraction to) is not, in and of itself sin. However, James 1:14-15 tells us; “But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it has run its course, brings forth death”. Later, in James 4:7 we are told to “resist the devil”. And, since the Bible tells me that; “everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28), I am just as guilty of sin, if I look and lust, as the same-sex attracted person is who practices homosexuality, if I don’t control my very thoughts. I have nothing to be proud of.
Considering the confessions that some gave that they have been same-sex attracted for as long as they have a memory, I tested my own memory. I cannot remember a time when I was not wholly and exclusive attracted to the opposite sex. So, I would have to say that “opposite-sex” attraction comes naturally to me. While it’s true that I don’t know the complete and full story of every individual who is same-sex attracted now, so I can’t, categorically say that outside influences had no part in this same-sex attractiveness. However, I can say categorically, that it is possible, given that we are born in sin, for a person to have this attraction from birth.
At this point it has to be said that, if the “comes natural” argument is to hold any water, if we are to allow our natural state to dictate our actions, then the simple fact would be that I should be able to have sex with anyone I’m “naturally” attracted to, who would have me. I am pretty sure most wives would quickly point out this flaw in the “nature” argument.
Further, the psychological community tells us that pedophiles can’t help their natural attraction to children, and they offer no cure (just say no and stay away from kids), yet for some reason, even a society that once condemned homosexuality now embraces the “nature” argument for many things, including homosexuality, still condemns pedophilia, and rightfully so. However, this is inconsistent. They say homosexuality is “natural” and there is no need for a cure, yet they condemn pedophilia even though they admit it is “natural” and there is no cure. Alcoholics are born with the vulnerability to alcohol addiction, yet, pretty much everyone applauds the alcoholic who “gets clean”. Many of those same people will criticize any attempt to encourage a person who is same-sex attracted to change their lifestyle. Of course, most of that criticism comes from those who embrace the lifestyle.
The argument is made, and I think it’s legitimate one, that it is a more difficult struggle for those who are same-sex attracted compared to my “struggle”. The same-sex attracted person would say that, at the very least, I can eventually satisfy my opposite-sex attraction by getting married and consummating that relationship, while they never can. While that is an absolutely valid point and I say this with great compassion for those who struggle with same-sex attraction, it is irrelevant to the principle.
Both of these sins fall under the category of a “besetting” sin. The Bible speaks clearly to how to handle a besetting sin. Whether it be same or inappropriate opposite-sex attraction, they are the same in God’s eyes. Since they are the same, they are to be treated the same. “Resist” “rid ourselves of”. There is nothing in Scripture, (and that is the place we go for wisdom on all human issues), that gives an exception, based on the difficulty factor of a particular sin. That said, neither of these sins (same-sex attraction or inappropriate opposite-sex attraction) is a walk in the park. Both involve considerable effort given to controlling our feelings, passions, longing to belong, and our very thoughts.
So, for those who struggle with same-sex attractiveness and those who look down (in pride) on those who have this struggle, I would draw your attention to something that seems to permeate my thoughts in all the things I write. Think deeper and more humbly regarding all human struggles. Strive to understand how God sees these things. It’s far too easy to simply listen to the talking heads of the Church or the particular political arenas you frequent. It is clear, when one delves into Scripture, that God “thinks” differently than we do. As one author put it, “our thoughts have been disordered by sin”, and I would add, “and by our own individual sin”.
I have enjoyed reading a number of things that have been written by Rosaria Butterfield. Her first book, “The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert” is a great place to start. Couldn’t put it down. And I’m not a “couldn’t put it down” type reader. She said in a follow up book, Openness Unhindered;
“When the Lord entered my world, I experienced that gospel-ignited “expulsive power of a new affection” (to quote the title of Thomas Chalmers’s famous sermon). That new affection was not heterosexuality, but Jesus, my Jesus, my friend and Savior. I was not converted out of homosexuality. I was converted out of unbelief.”
For full disclosure, given that the quote above sort of leaves that in question, she did leave the lesbian life she had been entrenched in all of her life up to the point of conversion (her book tells her story. I highly recommend it.), married a pastor and has several children.
In the lives of those around you, friends, family, colleagues, that you see practicing what you would call sin, I would encourage you to look with new eyes. Look at them first and foremost with compassion and love, given they/we are all alike created in God’s image and are thus, of equal value. Further, that you would see their sin and your sin, as Rosaria has suggested, to be symptomatic of the real problem, the real deadly sin, which some would call the unforgiveable sin; unbelief.
To be continued…