During a particularly difficult time in my life that found me quite desperate to understand the “why” of my situation, some Scriptures came to mind that changed me in significant ways. I began reading Job, something I hadn’t done for a very long time. Two things jumped out at me, one of which was significantly different than how I remembered the Job story. The other changed my thinking in profound ways.
First of all, I had thought that Satan had initiated the situation with God and Job. As I read it again, I realized that God had been the initiator! What!? According to the story, Satan was standing before God (I have no idea why this was or what caused Satan to come before God at this time) and said he had been “roaming about the earth”. This is where my memory had failed me and I thought the next line was Satan challenging God as to the faithfulness of Job. Nope. The next line was God’s. “Have you considered my servant Job? For there is no one like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, fearing God and turning away from evil.” This was followed by Satan’s response. “Then Satan answered the Lord, “Does Job fear God for nothing? Have You not made a fence around him and his house and all that he has, on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land. But reach out with Your hand now and touch all that he has; he will certainly curse You to Your face.” Then the Lord said to Satan, “Behold, all that he has is in your power; only do not reach out and put your hand on him.” God had taken this man Job, whom He had just described as “no one like him on earth” and totally threw him under the bus! In essence God had said, do what you like with him only don’t do any physical harm to him. Of course, later on even that restriction was lifted with the only thing left that God forbade was killing him.
I was really stunned by this revelation. But I kept reading. All the while the thought of God being the initiator was right there in front of me.
Now, some time later, as I thought back on this stunning revelation, I wondered why it hadn’t completely thrown me off. I saw at this point how important it is to take Scripture as a whole, rather than looking for verses and passages that fit a preferred narrative.
As I read on, I got to Job 38-40:1-2. Oh my. I cried as I read this. For the sake of space in this piece, though I would like to include the entire text and I would recommend reading it yourself, let me summarize. To Job’s question of why all this had happened to him, God answered, “I’m God and you’re not.” Job’s response was utterly appropriate. “Behold, I am insignificant; what can I say in response to You? I put my hand on my mouth. I will add nothing more.” In Scripture, this is a common response from those who come “face to face” with God.
A short time after reading Job I was reading in Isaiah and came to Isaiah 55:8-9. “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,” declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways And My thoughts than your thoughts.”
This is a familiar passage for anyone who was raised in the Church. But as with many things we grow familiar with, they lose their meaning, if we had actually ever considered their meaning in the first place. Too often Scripture memorization, especially with children, is induced with prizes. Of course, the intent is good, hoping that when they grow older, they will remember and THEN consider the meaning. In my case this was true. How good this method is, is a discussion for another time.
After reading Job and the Isaiah passage, and the logical progression of thought that came with it, I was reminded of a saying that had become popular some time ago. In fact, the saying had shown up on wristbands, and t-shirts and book covers and hats. The initialism of the phrase was WWJD, What Would Jesus Do? As with all things that become commercialized, they lose their meaning and simply become an entity unto itself. WWJD had become nothing more than a cliché. It’s not unlike a hyper familiar verse like John 3:16. Most can quote it, but few actually think about what it says.
With the book of Job and the Isaiah passages burned into my psyche, I realized that I had begun a sort of deconstruction, though this description had not become a thing as of yet. This word, “deconstruction” has become a term used by those who have mostly walked away from the faith. I’ve read numerous accounts of “former” Christians (some identify as Exvangelicals), who for one reason or another had become disillusioned with their faith and had decided to throw it all out and start over. Sadly, most started over by reading books by those who didn’t treat Christianity fairly, rather had already decided that it was a false/man-made religion, and proceeded to dedicate their lives to twisting and turning Bible stories and verses to suit their own narrative. I would suggest that, given the human psyche, it’s not possible to actually start over, as if one could wipe the slate of our lives clean with no residue or prejudice. But, of course, given that same psyche, we are capable of telling ourselves we are starting over. We are rarely honest when it comes to critiquing ourselves.
My own deconstruction was different than these. I was convinced that God existed, that Jesus was/is the Christ/messiah, and that Christianity was the way of the one true God. So, what, you may ask, was there to deconstruct. Actually, plenty.
As one who had grown up in the church, I began to take stock of the many influences both in the church and out that were extra-biblical. One might also call them non-biblical. I’m not going to go into the specifics of them in this piece, maybe a “part two” will follow. Rather, I would offer a suggestion, a challenge if you will.
Considering the Job story and the Isaiah passage, how Biblical are the things you believe? If, in fact, God’s “thoughts are not our thoughts, nor our ways His ways”, it seems to me that our lives should be a constant consideration of these questions; What are His thoughts? What are His ways? What would Jesus do?
“All of us should be prepared to hold up our preconceived notions to the light of Scripture to see if these assumptions are valid or not. The result of this process often involves the killing of some sacred cows, but that’s a good thing, if what we have held to be true cannot actually be supported by the biblical text. We all have our blind spots and traditions but we are not always aware of them. Therefore, the serious Bible student asks questions of himself and of the text constantly in order to determine what the sacred text actually says and then he builds his thinking on that.” (John Samson)
Over the past 20 years or so, since that very difficult time in my life, I have been asking these questions. It has affected every area of my life.
To be continued…