It appears to be contrary to our nature to invite criticism. I know I don’t like it when someone points out an apparent or potential flaw in my thinking. None of us want to think that we may be wrong. In fact, we go to great lengths to protect our perceived “rightness”.
Over the past 10 or 15 years I’ve had ongoing conversations with several people. Some friends, some who started out as strangers. Our conversations (carried out on line, through email and Facebook) can get pretty contentious at times, given the subject matter, but usually ends with a smiley face or a light-hearted bit of humor. This is, of course, necessary to express the emotion that is undetectable in this form of communication.
The contentiousness comes from the fact that most of our stated positions on many subjects are polar opposites. It is easy to see why this is so, given the fact that many of those I’m conversing with come from positions that are from an atheist/agnostic perspective, while mine are from the perspective of a Biblical Christian. It is not difficult to see why we don’t agree on most subjects. In those early days, I have to admit that I can get pretty defensive at times, as did they. Over the course of these conversations there has been the opportunity for both of us to clarify definitions. There were times when I painted science with a critical brush that was too broad, and they are quick to point this out. There are other times when they paint Christianity with that same brush. This is often from whence my defensiveness originates.
In many of these conversations, and I’m thinking of one in particular, the other person would characterize the Christian position by pointing out the most flagrant and egregious action of a person or group that identifies as Christian, yet the action is anything but Biblical.
I remember the first time someone did this I wanted to jump through the screen, grab him by the throat, give him a good shake, and scream, “ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!” Clearly this reaction would have been wrong on several levels. But this is not the reaction that stirred my thinking.
The point of this piece is not to make an argument against a particular position. Rather it is, in my round- about way, to address our instinctive objection to anything that is of a critical nature when talking about our beliefs. Most of us are far more comfortable talking to “the choir” than we are defending our positions to “hostiles”. I know I was. That has changed significantly.
As a Biblical Christian, my “marching orders”, my standard of living and thought are in the Bible. When it comes to the subject of defending the faith there is no more clear a Scripture than 1 Peter 3:15 “…but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence;” These conversations have done more to show me how lacking I have been in applying this verse than anything else I can remember.
The middle part of the verse is the easiest, and if it stood alone would certainly encourage our natural defensive reaction to any critique of our thought process. However, keeping it in context with the rest of the verse is where the true meaning comes into play. The last part of the verse, “…yet with gentleness and reverence,” takes this verse in a whole different direction, and one that is infinitely more challenging to the typical emotion of a debate or conversation of any depth. How in the world are we to defend our faith with gentleness and reverence when so often the challenge to that faith is so offensive and hurtful? This is the most difficult part. Certainly, we can grit our teeth and put on a smile and speak softly in our response, but is this really what the “new man” in Christ is called to do, pretend? It is the first part of the verse that is essential and the most difficult, “…but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts”.
It is when we sanctify Christ as Lord that our instincts change. It is when we sanctify Christ as Lord that we will be more likely to think as He did. One of the things that brought clarity to the “with gentleness and reverence” part of the I Peter passage was Christ’s purpose in coming. John 3:17, “For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him.” Our message to the world is not one of condemnation, but one of salvation.
As the old saying goes, “get the bee out of your bonnet’. Enter these conversations with intent, the same intent Jesus had when He spoke. It is a fact that these conversations, if entered with intent from a Biblical point of view, will invite criticism. Consider this. In the days that Jesus walked the earth, virtually everything He said (that we have a record of in the Bible) invited criticism. So, what should we do?
Sanctify Christ as Lord. Always be ready. Invite criticism. Also, the next time you face criticism, listen carefully. Take a deep breath. Pause to think. You may actually learn something. You may have the opportunity to teach.
Lastly, remember who YOU are. It is much easier to speak with “gentleness and reverence” if we keep in mind that we are saved by God’s grace and not because of some special attribute we possess. I think Paul said it best in…
1 Timothy 1:15-16 “It is a trustworthy statement, deserving full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, among whom I am foremost. Yet for this reason I found mercy, so that in me as the foremost, Jesus Christ might demonstrate His perfect patience as an example for those who would believe in Him for eternal life.”
Paul knew that he was to be the example of Christ to the world. As should we… with gentleness and reverence.
To be continued…